The “most wonderful time of the year” just wouldn’t be the same without its joyous melodies. Take, for example, this treasured Christmas jingle, which spread from schoolyard to schoolyard in the grandest folk tradition:
Jingle Bells, Batman smells
Robin laid an egg
The Batmobile lost its wheel
And the Joker got away
Believe it or not, that tune is now generally considered part of the Great American Songbook. But it’s not alone—the Smithsonian Institution has spent several decades carefully curating a trove of superhero-mocking holiday tunes that circulated on American playgrounds. And we got a preview! The Arrangement is proud to present this collection, for the first time in print:
(To the tune of “O Christmas Tree”)
O Superman, O Superman
Your powers are depleted
You cannot fly, stop time, or fight
Lex Luthor’s holding kryptonite
O Superman, O Superman
You soon will be defeated
(To the tune of “Feliz Navidad”)
Feliz Skeletor
You’re superior
He-Man is a bore
He forgets to lock doors
Castle Grayskull is yours
(To the tune of “Deck the Halls”)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Your demise will be eternal
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Shredder’s poisoned all your pizzas
Fa la la la la, la la la la
The Foot Clan is gonna beat ya
Fa la la la la, la la la la
(To the tune of “Here Comes Santa Claus”)
Here comes Spider-Man
Here comes Spider-Man
Hitting on Mary Jane
Peter Parker’s alter ego
Is battling in vain
The Green Goblin’s tied your web
And Spidey’s in for a fright
So get bent, Spider-Man
Sorry ‘bout Uncle Ben
The Goblin wins tonight
Haul out the holly and have a jolly holiday with The Arrangement on Saturday, December 14 at the Judge’s Bench Pub from 9:00pm to 12:30am!
The Arrangement features Mr. Drew Fontaine on acoustic guitar and vocals, accompanied by Mr. Phil Rosensteel on djembe, backing vocals, cymbals, penny whistle, and quite possibly the bandura. They play fun and inventive covers of all your favorite songs. Unless all your favorite songs are by Lou Monte. Sorry, but that’s just not how The Arrangement rolls. Yee-ikes, jing-a-di-jing, and heehaw.
Check out The Arrangement’s sweet website here: http://thearrangementband.com.
And the Judge’s Bench Pub here: http://judgesbenchpub.com.
Have any questions? Please holla.
the arrangement 